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A year, where have you been, miss you said again, etc. w4m It's been a year since I started these. After a few of them, do you remember sitting down and we were talking and you said - "you can ask me anything you want to"( we were also talking about Washington State and how I would take you but drive and you said I would try to talk you out of.)....I was not sure what kind of questions you meant....being the chicken shit that I am, I choose the safest route by asking for assistance in other things...(that are great fun, but) ...if you say that to me again the questions would be different though the fear would still be there...I am wondering if you still want me to ask questions... I always wonder if you are reading these, but most of the time I'm sure I'm quite delusional to think that..but sometimes things you say make me really wonder... synchronicity, coincidence, the cosmos playing a not so funny joke on me...I wish you would say that I can ask you anything again...I would try very hard to have the courage to ask relevant things...my fears of rejection and abandonment still seem to rule my life, no matter how hard I am working on them.. the answers you give wouldn't change my great affection, admiration and love for you...I'm quite crazy about you (I think crazy is likely the operative word here and I'm sure you agree...lol)...

PS: You looked so cute this week cute=sexy...have a good weekend...I won't see you again soon enough...st/sp...sigh... don't be an idiot and use SPF 50 or above...you are more stubborn adult chat in Hilliard Ohio than a Missouri mule...

I'm trying really hard not to be sad so much and not to think about you being gone and how hopeless this whole thing is...any measure of success at this is simply amazing (despite what you and PT Barnum think...lol)

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